Things are afoot–both with this blog and behind the scenes–but I’ve been told that blogs are the sort of things you’re supposed to update with semi-regular posts…So, in celebration of the art of writing, I present to you these practical insider secrets to writing that should address most challenges the average writer might face at some point or another:
The best way to tell a really touching story is with Braille (use sandpaper for the rough draft). If you just want to give sound advice, use an audiobook (particularly a book on tape if you want your message to stick). If you have trouble with spelling, use a wand. Literacy is a four letter word. Imitation is the highest form of flattery (unless you have moral hang-ups about plagiarism). Resolve writer’s block with a Ouija board. Witness protection is a free pass to write a fictional autobiography. If you want your writing to turn into cash, you can start by writing checks. Keep copies of the letters you write for personal reference (collect all 26 for a full alphabet).